Since this began I've made two commitments to myself. First of all, no more secrets. Secondly, I'd respect C's personal space. This past weekend I broke the latter commitment and as a result created a secret.

Empathy is dead

I would think Americans with less skin pigment would be less familiar with the institutional racism and biases Americans with more skin pigment experience.   However, to have the viewpoint requires some humility and integrity and willingness to admit my experience is not the only human experience with value. This is called empathy. A learned... Continue Reading →

Ten and poor

Recently, I sat for a few hours talking to a 98-year-old woman about her experiences in a small rural Wisconsin town. The woman is amazing and still sharp as a tack. For over 25 years she owned a grocery store in this town and every summer she and her husband extended credit to the local... Continue Reading →


I spent most of my life trying to be the good guy and do what I thought was best. Sometimes I have failed spectacularly. However, most of the time I did a good job contrary to what you think you know. Most of my life I have given one individual opportunity after opportunity and when things... Continue Reading →

You are valuable & worthy

"We do not believe in ourselves until someone reveals that deep inside us is something valuable, worth listening to, worthy of our trust, sacred to our touch." — e.e cummings (via psych-quotes) I will just set this here for you: whether you know it or it or not, you are valuable, you are worthy. Remember.... Continue Reading →

John Steinbeck on Falling in Love: A 1958 Letter to his son

Wish I had learned this truth sooner. Now that I know, I hope I can pass it on. Taken from John Steinbeck's book: Steinbeck: A Life in Letters. I found the text on Maria Popova's Brain Picking's page. New York November 10, 1958 Dear Thom: We had your letter this morning. I will answer it from my... Continue Reading →


The mail arrived and I was reminded again why it is best I do not judge other people's lives. The mail was a reminder that sometimes you screw something up to the point where you are left wondering if the most merciful thing to do is put it down, have a ceremony and move on.... Continue Reading →

Life Lessons: A Boy’s War

This is not the path I wanted for my life. It is the path I choose. For example, I don’t have any children. I’m not going to get into semantics but just to maintain full-disclosure: I haven’t seen my daughter since she was five. She is twenty-two now (but I’ve talked about that elsewhere and... Continue Reading →

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