A Fool’s Tale

(For often) a man’s own angry pride Is cap and bells for a fool.” – Tennyson. Maud, VI.

I do not see any way home for me following the reveal of my lies and infidelity. C’s passive-aggressive revenge and my fracturing and betrayal have resulted in one post-discovery choice after another sandbagging opportunities for a future together.

However, what is true for me isn’t true for everyone. I think this is a great read.

Don’t let angry pride make you a fool.

The Queen Is In

buckle up

I had a Twitter conversation this morning with a remorseful man who cheated. I tried to express how I felt when I found out, how ugly my frame of mind was at the time, devoid of any kind of logic or rational behavior.  The tweeting back and forth brought me back to those first days.

When I first found out, it was a total shock. I did my research and within hours I knew who the skank was and where she lived.  I printed the phone logs. Within 24 hours, I saw an attorney to begin divorce proceedings and the following evening, I went to her house.  My husband’s car was on the street. I remember wanting to smash his windshield with a sledgehammer.  My body was shaking, my heart was broken, my life as I knew it was shattered and the sheer rage was overwhelming.  As I recall that…

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Ten and poor

Recently, I sat for a few hours talking to a 98-year-old woman about her experiences in a small rural Wisconsin town. The woman is amazing and still sharp as a tack. For over 25 years she owned a grocery store in this town and every summer she and her husband extended credit to the local... Continue Reading →

Why love?

Food for thought: "Without love, our self-esteem weakens. Without it, our courage fails. Without love, we can no longer look out confidently at the world." I understand. Wish I didn't.


The mail arrived and I was reminded again why it is best I do not judge other people's lives. The mail was a reminder that sometimes you screw something up to the point where you are left wondering if the most merciful thing to do is put it down, have a ceremony and move on.... Continue Reading →

Redux: It’s amazing what a boy will do for a little piece of tail

For a father there are little moments of unadulterated terror. For teen fathers it is all terror - at least for me. You see the life you imagined dissolving into the life you've chosen. I'm not complaining - my daughter was the single best gift of my life - but the reality is nothing can... Continue Reading →

The Things I Carry: Critics taste better deep fried and with chips (Part 6)

Critical people are a bane on my life. A poison to my soul. Am I being critical? Does that make me a hypocrite? I don’t mean pragmatists. You can be a pragmatist and not be critical. I myself am a pragmatist with borderline optimistic tendencies. No. I’m talking about the critics in my life. The negative.... Continue Reading →

The End of Mythology: Ralph’s death (Part 1)

My grandfather died last August. His death significantly changed my worldview. Ralph's death helped me see the mythology of my family is not the reality. And honestly, it pissed me off. It pissed me off because for the first time I was able, with the guidance of a caring but uninvolved friend, to see the... Continue Reading →

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